7 Thoughts That Stop Us From Being Successful In Life

Steven Smith Hypnotherapist
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Our thoughts are our reality, they are the building blocks of our success. So if you suffer from irrational thinking, all your doing is hurting yourselves, it affects your lives in drastic ways, separating the successful from the unsuccessful. They mean the difference between loving or hating ourselves, it’s the difference between war and peace, and all war is caused by irrational thinking.

Below you will find several common crushing thoughts, and hopefully, if you suffer from these thoughts, it will help you to change your life and become more successful.

1) If Someone Criticizes Me, There Must Be Something Wrong With Me

There are many reasons why we criticise each other, but it does not mean there is something wrong with us. If they do criticise, it just says they have a difference of opinion to you which is fantastic, because without difference of view in the world it would be a very dull place to live in and nothing would ever change.

2) I Will Not Do Anything New

Doing new things gives us the opportunity to grow, develop and learn more about ourselves. Now, you don’t have to be good at everything in life. With that said it doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy new experiences even if you are crap at them. Sticking to the same old things all the time will just lead to a dull and repetitive life which is just not fun.
Plus if you do what you’ve always done, then you’re going to get what you’ve always got. Mix it up a bit.

3) I Must Seek Approval To Feel Good About Myself

This is very damaging thought especially when it becomes embedded in our beliefs. There is no way you can please everyone in life all the time. The only approval you should seek is your own, it’s your life, and you live it. The most important thing is, you’re Happiness and making sure you feel good what matters.

Yes, it is nice to have other people’s opinions but don’t go out of your way to please everyone as a lot will not even appreciate the effort. At the same time don’t go out of your way to hurt people to make you feel happy as this just says more about you than them, and will only ever give you a short-lived happy feeling.

4) It's Not My Fault...

Well, I’m sorry to say, but it is. Now, this doesn’t make you a bad person, it doesn’t mean you’re a failure. You control your thoughts and therefore your actions, nobody else. These are the things that determine your life. 

Now, if you always blame others for the way your life has turned out you have given all your power away to them. Take back control. Take responsibility for your thoughts and actions. Start thinking that you can achieve whatever you set your mind to and believe me or not you will start to see the world in a different light and begin to achieve.

5) Everyone Is Better Than Me

That’s just the way you feel and when you believe that, it will make it real. Surprising or not if someone else can do something so can you, the only thing stopping you, is you. Adopt someone else’s mind map, notice what they are doing, how they’re doing it and build on it. Also recognising your strengths will help you build your confidence so that you can go on to achieve. 

Don’t put yourself down, each time you fail, in failure we learn and the only time we honestly fail is when we give up. If you realise that somebody is better than, its OK it’s only at that time because you will get there and succeed once you start putting your mind to it.

6) I've Been Rejected, There Is Something Wrong With Me

This is over generalising things, but let me give an example. Maybe a person has been rejected by their partner, and then they go on to think What did I do wrong? Why was I rejected? And then they start connecting things that aren’t really related to the current situation and then begin to believe that this always happens to them, and they are somehow unworthy of love. 

Now people reject others for many reasons, usually difference of interests, ideas or opinions, it’s just what we do as a species, but it doesn’t mean you’re in anyway unworthy it just means your thoughts don’t match someone else’s, which is cool. If they did, we wouldn’t really grow because we would all be the same. On another note, if you continue thinking this way, guess what it is all you’re going to find. Think the thoughts that you wish to attract.

7) I'm happy, Something is Bound to go Wrong

This one makes me laugh, I use to say it myself, I would actively stop being happy because I expected shit to hit the fan as it had done in the past, that I would go looking for this thing that was going to go wrong, and guess what I always found it. Now, what use is that? I could have spent all that time focusing on happiness but got caught up in my own imaginary shit storm that I went looking for. 

You deserve all the happiness and joy you make for yourself, your past is your past, and the future is what you make of it. If there are still issues from your past that are blocking you from feeling happy about today then seek help to resolve these. Don’t taint your present and your future thoughts with bad memories. Otherwise, you risk of fulling your own negative prophecy.

Now Heres A Simple Way To Stop Theses Destructive Thoughts

When they happen, catch them, every time you have an irrational thought or self-defeating thought merely replace the words with positive ones. Here’s an example of what I mean:

You’re driving along on a beautiful day, and suddenly a bird decides to crap on your car… 

Now you may think:
Why does this always happens to me? Why do they always crap on my car?

Change it to something like:
Well it’s about time I got my car washed… (Smile)

Can you see the keyword that makes this first statement entirely negative? ‘Always.’ Now always isn’t a negative word but when used this way it is. Also, when used in comments like this it is a complete and utter lie because if it were true, your car would be covered 24/7 in bird shit. It would be floating in the stuff, so catch yourself with these tall tails and make them positive.

Here’s a few more tall tails we tell ourselves:
Always….. I always get caught in the rain – Now if that were true you would Nemo now are you a fish?

Never….. I can never find a car parking space – If this was true why do you have a car or are you still driving looking for that space never stopping? In which case you need to get off your device and concentrate on the road.

I couldn’t….. I couldn’t walk a mile – Have you ever tried and let’s be honest most people walk over a mile each day doing their day-to-day activities.

I’m hopeless at…… I’m hopeless at talking to lots of people – Now this one is just funny as it’s usually said while talking to lots of people (friends). And these friends were once strangers that you started talking to.

It’s terrible…. isn’t it terrible that it’s raining? – No, because if it didn’t rain, we would be living in a desert, dying of thirst.

The list is endless of irrational thoughts that bring you and your happiness down, So catch yourself thinking about them and flip them to something positive that’s going to boost you and your life or even laugh at how silly the thought was and how untrue it was. I hope this helps you to catch yourself when these thoughts occur and help you bring your life into perspective and greater success.

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